


Glitter Fiasco in Ikea

by brunchywrites



Category: DCU
Genre: AU, Family Fluff, Fluff, IKEA, Other, obviously, takes place when Jason is Robin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-07
Updated: 2018-02-07
Packaged: 2019-03-15 03:21:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13604472
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brunchywrites/pseuds/brunchywrites
Summary: Bruce didn’t think Jason would like to go to Ikea, at least they have to get something for his school project if anything- at least they’ll make a trip out of it.





	Glitter Fiasco in Ikea

When Jason accidentally broke his dresser it was Alfred who suggested going to ikea to get a new one. Bruce hadn’t expected Jason to light up at the thought of building his own dresser. Plus they had ‘errands’ to run anyways, and Jason had to get stuff for his newest History project. Bruce will never understand Mrs. O’Hare’s obsession with making her students draw personified versions of empires and dynasties and using that to show what was going on in history at the time via medical issues. Maybe it worked, Jason seemed to enjoy doing the projects assigned to him.

So there Bruce stands in a craft store, picking up various pieces of scrapbooking paper while Jason inspects various pens and markers.

“I’m thinking we cut out clothing with the card stock and use the markers for details,” Bruce says, “After all during the Byzantine Empire, clothing was layered and patterned, reds, greens.. also blues if I’m remembering right,” he looks down at Jason, “Sound good, chum?”

Jason shakes his head, “No, everyone copied me when we did that last time, and the Byzantine Empire was actually decently advanced for its time. I mean after the fall of Rome…” he shrugs his shoulders and puts a pen back, “I was thinking glitter.”  
  
Glitter? Now that was promising, Bruce had been doing a lot of research on Pinterest to gather more ideas for the projects Jason did, and glitter always seemed to make them pop more. Why not?

“I mean glitter isn’t historically accurate, like at all,” Jason starts, picking up a piece of burgundy paper and testing how thick it is with his finger tips, “But it’ll leave it’s mark in Mrs. O’Hare’s class for sure. I swear she can’t teach us unless she gives us these projects.”

Bruce snorts, “Would you prefer book work?”

“Yes! God, I really would. Projects are fun but it never kills to actually do research on something. Writing papers is fun! We gotta get the glitter though, and go to ikea.”

“Alright, I’m sure we still have paper from Sir Zoroastrian left to finish Byzantine’s clothes. Have you a name for the empire?” Bruce asks as he follows Jason down to the glitter aisle. He’s positive his son has the floor plans of the craft store memorized just from the amount of times he’s had to be in here. Bruce does but he memorized it the first time they had to go buy wooden dowels and ceramic paint for a particularly messy science project.

Jason turns down the aisle and stands in front of the wall of glitters, tapping his fingers on his chin as he inspects each one. His eyes bounce between the silvers to the red, then gold.

“Uh-huh, her name is Beth Byzantine,”

“Good name,” Bruce nods and looks at the wall with him. He reaches for a green glitter and looks back down at Jason. The boy is clearly deep in thought and he can’t help but chuckle at it. These projects have always been quite serious for Jason. Grades in general were, and it’s something Bruce is very grateful for. Jason enjoys school and so far it seems like school enjoys him back.

“See anything you like?”

“No, it’s all one color, not shiny enough..” he gestures violently at the wall of twinkling plastic, “And not good for the environment!”

“Most glitter isn’t, you know that, right?”

Jason shoots Bruce a look, “Duh, glitter is just pretty plastic pieces, causes a lot of damage to the ocean because it sits or gets consumed by animals- but it’s so.. good.”

“Fair enough,” Bruce looks at the glitter and spots something he’s sure Jason will enjoy. He reaches for it and hands the bottle to his son. Rainbow glitter, it shifts colors in the light.

Jason’s eyes widen, and he turns the bottle over in his hands a few times before grinning, “It’s perfect- okay! Let’s go to Ikea! We gotta go fast otherwise it gets way to crowded and it’s not fun when it’s crowded.”

“Have you been to an Ikea before, Jay?” Bruce asks as he follows him down the aisle and towards the front counter. Jason is quite busy rolling the container of glitter in his hands, despite holding four other bottles in the crook of his elbow.

“No, but Braden from school went when it was busy and said his mom freaked out. You won’t freak out in Ikea, right?”

Bruce shakes his head, rolling his eyes at the thought of a middle aged woman freaking out in an Ikea over the fact that it was busy. That was ridiculous and something that Bruce wouldn’t understand. Mostly because he doesn’t do a lot of his own shopping but the point stands.

“Don’t worry about me, it’s just Ikea,” he says firmly as they make it to the checkout counter, readying his card and the tip out of complete habit.

The Ikea isn’t that busy, but Jason has insisted on holding the rainbow glitter bottle. Won’t put it down for his life, every few seconds on their walk inside he shifts the bottle to stare at the glitter as it shifts. Bruce didn’t think he’d enjoy it quite this much but it makes him smile to see.

The store is bright, Gotham’s Ikea is about three floors, stocked full of furniture as far as the eye can see. Bright colors assault his vision but when he looks down at Jason the boy is just in awe. His mouth is dropped open.

“Holy sh- crap! It’s freaking huge! No one told me how big it was, there’s!” He starts pulling Bruce along by the arm, not that he minds. He’s glad Jason is more comfortable with him in public for the most part, they’re no longer at that awkward distance that they used to have.

“Okay, slow down Jay-Lad, my knees ache with your energy,” he sighs dramatically, but Jason stops and gives him a stink eye. Bruce smirks at him.

Jason rolls his eyes, “Bulllllcraaap! I am calling bull crap, c’mon let’s go. Dressers can’t be that far,” he keeps pulling and Bruce follows as Jason looks around. Oddly enough, he looks like a meerkat peering around the way he does, going up on his toes to look over at things on high shelves, even displays.

He’s having particular trouble with a wall of chairs and tables, organized by color. Jason is on the top part of his toes and Bruce very quietly lifts him up so he can see better. He feels a light slap on his arm.

“I was fine,” he hisses slightly, but squirms as he looks around. Practically buzzing with curiosity.

“Mhm, sure you were,” another light slap and Bruce flicks his knee. “You’re allowed to ask to look.”

Jason shrugs, “But we’re here for dressers- I FOUND THE DRESSERS!”

Bruce slowly sets Jason back down on the floor and nearly has to jog to keep up with his son. He wonders if it was a bad idea to let him into an Ikea, or any huge store like it.

Correction, he knows it’s a bad idea. He sees it happen like it’s in slow motion, Jason is running for a different aisle and trips over his own foot, and before Bruce can even reach he hits the floor.

The glitter, most importantly, goes flying. Bottle and all, the cap pops off and in seconds glitter paints the floor and some of the stark white furniture around it.

Firstly, Bruce helps Jason up and helps brush the glitter off. There’s so much of it, and it’s everywhere, there’s not one spot in at least six feet that doesn’t have a speck of glitter on it. It paints a shimmery rainbow potrait over the normally pristine area and honestly? Bruce finds it horribly ironic but also hilarious, there’s just so much glitter.

“Wow, I guess that’s why it’s called craft herpes,” Jason shakes the glitter off his hair, “Ohhh man, it’s everywhere.”

Bruce nods, “Yeah, at least 6 feet, covered in glitter, I will say this is quite a feat.” He’s trying hard not to laugh at the way Jason’s face scrunches up as he examines the damage.

“It’s not like you meant to spill it, did you?”

“No! That was for Byzantine’s clothing not the Ikea floor and furniture!” He stops and looks down at himself, “Or me.”

He can’t hold it in anymore, Bruce snorts and turns his head into his shoulder. His body shakes with every repressed chuckle, and Jason shoves him.

“It’s not funny!”

“You spilled the glitter for Byzantine-“

“Stop!’ Ugh you’re awful,” Jason shoves him again but this time with a smile, “An employee is coming, look we’re gonna get in trouble.”

Bruce is still laughing, trying to gain his composure as he helps Jason stand back up. He’s just wiped the tears that threatened to escape his eyes when the employee marches over.

“We’re going to have to ask you two to leave- violation products,” the woman is almost seething, and Jason is partially hiding behind his legs.

Bruce composes himself, “I can pay for the damage, apologies Miss. We just had a bit of a.. glitter fiasco.”

**Author's Note:**

> I just wanted to write this tbh, I thought it was a fun idea. If you wanna support my writing please feel free to follow me on my tumblr @brunchyarts where I also post my smaller works and do requests! Thanks for reading


End file.
